


Shinobi in Space

by BloodyKangaroo



Category: Naruto, To Love-Ru
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-06
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-02-28 10:22:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2728805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BloodyKangaroo/pseuds/BloodyKangaroo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Naruto stumbles across a crashed ship during the night of the Mizuki incident. After messing around in the control room those aboard get launched into the void of space. Now how will they get to either of their homes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Blast off

A blond young man in an orange and blue jacket with a red spiral on the back and goggles was leaping through trees with a massive yellow scroll with green ends tied to his back. He hopped up along looking for a clearing he had been told to practice in when a flash of pink caught his eye. It was only for a moment and he wouldn't have seen it at all if not for the fact that the only other colors in sight were brown and dark green. He tried to ignore it but curiosity got the better of him and he turned back to see where the pink think had gone. He bounced along the forest back towards where he had glimpsed the brief flash of color. He hopped tree to tree looking for the pink thing wondering what it was.

"A flower maybe?" He thought. "Or a."

He didn't finish the thought as he heard a discussion in the distance.

"Almost got it." A female voice said.

Another replied. "Be careful."

Naruto carefully moved towards the sound looking around every few feet he looked around until he finally saw the weirdest thing he'd seen. What looked to be a white humanoid doll thing with bat like wings was floating towards the top of a tree reaching for something metallic. On the ground watching was a girl with long pink hair and green eyes in a white dress with a black second layer beneath it torn socks that appeared to be black and white striped at one point and some head thing with a single bat wing on it. She was also dirty and holding several metallic things at the same time. Well no leaving now he had to find out what was going on here.

He jumped down beneath two the ground behind the girl. The girl startled by the thud threw her hands up and all the metallic bits flew up into the air. The blond looked up and watched as seemingly in slow motion as a large grey and dirty block descended onto his face. He hit the ground twitching and unconscious. The girl and flying doll stared at the unconscious boy with a navigational computer on his face lying on the ground and turned to each other nervously.

The blond woke later on a sterile metallic room lying on a stiff but useable bed. He sat up and looked around clutching his head.

"Ow! Did a tree fall on me?!" He wondered standing up.

He slowly looked around and it took a few seconds for him to realize that this wasn't a hospital room. He blamed that on the apparent head injury. He took a few uneasy steps across the room and approached a weird rounded circular indent. He stepped out into a cold metal hallway. He walked along checking the rooms one by one as he went. The first simply held a large number of boxes some on the floor some on shelves. The next he came to was a simple bathroom with naught but a sink and a toilet. The third room was dark and he couldn't tell what was supposed to be in there the hall light only revealing some broken glass he figured was probably the light bulb.

In the fourth room he noticed something was up. There was light in this room but shattered glass and some branches, rocks, dirt, and other debris. The lights in this room had survived just enough to give it an air of desolation and creepiness. The back wall had a bunch of large shutters and glinting indicating that there had at some point been some kind of window there that was shattered and the hole covered. There were some broken parts and a few busted screens of some kind resembling the monitors he'd seen at the hospital sometimes. He looked over the scanning it in search quickly as the only thing that gave this room some life was a clicking noise. The sound of something banging off metal followed by voices suddenly kicking up didn't help. He stood trembling staring into what appeared, to him anyway, to be a haunted room.

He was about to bolt for it when again he saw something that seemed vaguely familiar. There was a girl with a head of pink hair with two hands clutching the top of her head standing at one of the monitors with a desk a floating doll thing near it. He briefly debated the chances of her being a ghost before the sound of distress clear in her voice drove him to check on her. He walked over careful to avoid any glass as he approached.

When he finally made it to the other side of the room he looked up and was hard pressed to keep calm. He hadn't gotten to see the girl up close earlier before. At least he didn't think he did whatever hit his head had left him kind fuzzy. The girl in question even dirty and clearly exhausted was easily one of if the cutest girl he had ever met. He stood staring without realizing it for a few seconds before the floating doll did something that seemed like a cough to catch his attention. This seemed to snap the girl out of a daze as well as probably caused by lack of sleep and stress.

"Um hi." The boy said raising a hand in an attempt to wave.

The girl stared at him for a second and opened her mouth to respond before collapsing. The boy panicked and caught before she hit the ground.

"Lala sama!?" The doll exclaimed in fright.

The boy checked her head for injury or fever was the first to hear the soft snoring that told him she had just fallen asleep. He released a breath he hadn't even realized he'd been holding and smiled at the doll who must have heard it to since it calmed down. The boy carefully moved the pinkette onto his back and tried to move for the door.

"Where are you taking Lala sama?" The doll asked a hint of worry in its voice.

"I was going to put her in the room I woke up in." The boy answered.

The doll nodded at that deeming it acceptable and followed as the boy carefully traced his way across the room.

"So." He said trying to fill the silence. "What are you?"

"I am Peke an all-purpose costume robot made by Lala sama." The floating do-costume robot said. "And you are?"

"Uzumaki Naruto." The boy answered and then gave a massive grin while squinting.

"Naruto san if you don't mind me asking what were you doing out in the woods so late at night?" Peke asked.

Naruto's eyes widened and he looked a little panicked as he said. "Ah crap the test!"

Before Peke could ask him to clarify he took off as fast as he could to the other end of the hall and set Lala down on the bed he woke up on. He immediately began tossing the room rapidly moving from place to place with far more speed and ease than someone in his condition should be able to display. He found the scroll sitting on a shelf and breathed a sigh of relief before turning around.

"What time is it?" He asked. "Is it sun rise yet?"

"I don't know." The robot answered. "We have been in here for hours trying to repair the ship."

Naruto was going to ask the tiny floating machine for a way out when the girl behind him muttered something in her sleep. Naruto froze and for a brief instant debated leaving the girl behind against the chances of him actually passing. He didn't even need the time it took to finish the thought before deciding to help.

"Hey is there any way I could help?" He asked while thinking resignedly. "It's probably too late for me to learn anything before Mizuki sensei got to the clearing anyway."

"Are you sure?" Peke asked him. "What about that test you just panicked about."

Naruto replied with an optimistic. "Eh there's always next year."

The robot looked at him for a second and said. "Well I assume Lala sama is hungry."

"Okay then let's see where the kitchen is this thing has to have some grub on here somewhere." He said.

Peke followed behind just in case he got lost. After all Lala was asleep and wouldn't be going anywhere for a while and she had to make sure the boy wasn't up to anything. Unlikely as it was he could still be planning something. Naruto meanwhile debated if he should give the scroll to Mizuki at the clearing or just return it straight to old man Hokage. Oh well he'd figure it out after taking care of the hungry, sleep deprived girl.

"Hey I forgot to ask." Naruto said as the poked around the rooms looking for something resembling a kitchen or dining hall.

"Yes?" Peke asked.

"What's a robot?" He asked calmly and without a hint of joking in his tone.

Peke stared for a few seconds before determining that, yes he was serious. Peke thought about how to answer that one. Naruto smiled as he finally found a room that seemed to have some kind of stove at the back. He stepped forward and tried to find some kind of fridge. Eventually stumbled across a large door in the wall and found a new problem. The door wouldn't open. He glared at the door and tried to shove his fingers into the gap between the two parts of the seal. He grabbed and gave a strained growl as he pulled as hard as he could. The door didn't budge. He put one foot on the wall and tried again with all the force he could muster he lifted his second leg and placed the foot on the wall.

He took a deep breath and gave one loud shout and pulled. His fingers slipped out and went flying through the air and crashed into the wall with a loud thud. He fell on his ass and sat glaring at the door holding his head.

"Perhaps we should." Peke stared.

Naruto reached into a pouch on his leg and pulled out a kunai charging screaming at the door. He refused to be beaten by a kitchen appliance. He slammed the blade into the door's seal and tried to pry it open. His feat stuck on the wall again soon and he pulled as hard as he could. Peke floated over and grabbed his back pulling hard and soon the two heard the door opening and with one final pull the door burst open. The two went flying and once again crashed into a wall. The kunai spiraled through the air and got stuck in the floor.

Naruto stood up slowly and walked over feeling victorious as the air got cooler near the door. He walked around and found it lined with boxes of what appeared to be some kind of military rations. Well they wouldn't taste good but they should at least be healthy. He pulled two out and pushed the impossibly heavy door shut. Then he tried the stove seeing if they could be heated up. The stove had a completely flat, black surface where the fire was supposed to come out. Naruto stared annoyed at the knobs he couldn't read and just went for it. He pressed the thing down and twisted. It took a few seconds but he noticed a coil beneath the surface starting to glow faintly.

Naruto shrugged and began raiding anything that looked like it might have a skillet. He eventually found one and set it on the now brightly glowing coil. He through what was in one of the round ration containers in the thing and a sizzle told him it was doing what it was supposed to. He grinned in triumph at having figured out the weird stove thing. A few more minutes later and a steaming plate of whatever mess of meat and vegetables were in the thing plopped down on the counter.

"Well there you go lunch." Naruto said.

There was a brief moment of silence.

"Is that for me?" Peke asked.

"Yeah." Naruto said. "Why do you think I grabbed two?"

"Naruto san." Peke said. "Robots don't eat."

Naruto blinked once and looked at the floating white thing in confusion.

"We're machines." Peke explained.

Naruto stood completely unmoving for a second before exploding into a storm of movement. He circled around so fast that Peke could swear there were six or seven of the orange clad boy.

"You're a machine?" Naruto asked. "But you can move and talk and stuff."

"A robot is a machine that has the ability to move and operate on its own." Peke explained.

Naruto nodded and looked completely stunned for a few seconds. He shook his head and decided to save it for later and figured no point in wasting a perfectly good.

"I was right." Naruto thought annoyed. "That did taste like ass."

He spent the next two hours scavenging every surviving seasoning jar he could find, which came out to about ten kilos each of salt and what he guessed was some weird foreign pepper equivalent. He threw some salt on the next ration and tried cooking the vegetables a little sooner than the meat. He through the heated up ration back in the box and carried it back towards the room he had left the sleeping girl in. Naruto set the round box down and sat at the back of the room trying to think of what to do. On the one hand he really should be turning in that test and going home. On the other hand he really didn't want to leave this girl alone in the woods in her state. On a third hand somehow he was insanely curious about all of this and really wanted to just sit there asking questions.

"Hey Peke." Naruto said.

"Yes?" The costume bot answered.

"What is this place anyway?" Naruto asked.

"It is a military cruiser from Deviluke." Peke said.

"I've never heard of Devilke." Naruto said scratching his head. "Is it on a different continent or."

"It's another planet." Peke answered.

Naruto nodded eyes shut and stopped cold for a few seconds before his snapped wide open. "Wait what?"

"Deviluke the center of an empire that spans the entire galaxy." Naruto stared dumbfounded.

"How the hell did she get on board a ship like that?!" Naruto half shouted.

"Lala sama is the first princess of Deviluke." Peke responded.

Naruto just stared at the sleeping girl in awe. This lead to him seeing something he had been too distracted to notice the first notice the first time. The girl had a long dark red, almost black, spade tipped tail. Lala's eyes slowly opened and she started sit up.

"Wha's tha shouting?" She asked through yawn.

She looked at Peke then at Naruto and back to Peke before falling back and drifting off to sleep again.

Naruto chuckled sheepishly and turned to Peke and whispered. "I think I'll go explore a bit more so I don't wake her up."

Peke nodded. "I'll stay here and watch over Lala sama."

Naruto nodded and headed out of the room. He walked through the hall whistling before he came to the room he had found Lala and Peke in after waking up. He looked around inside and walked over to the station the pink haired girl had come out of and found a gaping panel still removed. He poked his head in out of curiosity and found a set of circuitry far beyond his comprehension. Nothing he looked at made any sense except one thing a single unplugged cable. He stuck his arm in and grabbed it attaching the plug to the closest matching point. The room behind him started to light up rapidly. He pulled his head out to find several monitors turning on at once and the one just above him running through some green and black monochrome display in a language he couldn't read. He felt the ground beneath him rumbling and heard a loud whirring noise.

Back in the room Peke was freaking out as the rumbling of the ship and loud sounds caught its attention. The last time this had happened was when Lala had accidentally engaged the launch protocol. But who could have.

"Oh no." Peke said as the thundering roar of the massive ship taking off.

On the ground in the forest several men in green flak jackets with rectangles of metal stood outside of a crater with something half buried in the bottom that they had found searching for Naruto. Suddenly the earth split open as a large, rectangular, metal thing rose from the underground. One end pointed itself into the sky and they all watched helplessly as the machine launched itself away leaving a stunned crowd with a story no one would believe.


	2. The art of spaceship maintenance

Naruto stared at the computer standing surprisingly well considering he was on a space ship leaving the atmosphere. Peke flew in to find Naruto staring at the monitor confused but otherwise fine. With all the glass flying about that was rather surprising but not important. The glass soon hit the ground as an artificial gravity system kicked in.

"Peke." Lala's voice called out. "What's going on?"

"Naruto san, the boy we met in the woods, has restarted the system and caused the ship to take off." Peke responded.

Naruto stared at the monitor trying to make sense of the nonsense on the screen. It took a few seconds to register what Peke had said. Lala meanwhile got right back to work trying to make the various bits of the ship work the way they were supposed to. Naruto stared forward thinking over what he had just heard. Lala's tapping on the keyboard was the only sound anyone could hear until a whirring sound kicked up. A large monitor rose from the floor it was segmented into three parts and turned on. The left and right monitors worked fine but the middle one seemed to cut to static ever few seconds but it still showed well enough. Naruto looked out at stars in every single direction for as far as they could see. Naruto stared for a few seconds as what was happening finally sunk in for the first time. Rather than admiring the majesty of the infinite universe he was drifting through he began to freak out.

"Oh shit." He said in subdued tone.

The other two on the bridge looked over at him as his face shifted slowly from calm to sad to straight up terrified.

"Wait where are we going?" Naruto asked.

"I don't know the auto pilot isn't working right." Lala said voice slightly strained. "It just picked a random planet and headed in that direction."

Naruto stared dumbfounded. "What?"

"I had to make a bunch of the main systems out of spare parts and leftovers from redundant parts." Lala shouted back.

Naruto didn't get all of that but understood there were soaring through space in patch job. He didn't know what that meant. He had no way of knowing space was a vacuum. He didn't even know what a vacuum was. However it didn't take a genius to figure out that anything that needed air tight shutters between you and it wasn't something you could just stroll through. Naruto was lost in a thousand yard stare towards the monitors. Naruto shook his head calmed himself down and he switched to a grin and squint.

"I'm." Naruto said. "I'm going to go find my scroll."

He walked off before anyone could say anything and headed back to the dark room. He didn't want to be found for a little while.

Back on the bridge Lala and Peke were trying to get some kind of schematic so she could figure out what needed fixing. They still didn't know the full extent of the crash damage and had only taken care of the engines and vital systems. Really there wasn't even a way to be sure that they weren't just flying right at some star. Lala fingers ran rapidly over the keyboard as she tried to find the file she was looking for. A loud buzzing went off suddenly followed by flashing red lights and an emergency notice popping up on every monitor on the bridge.

"What's going on?!" Peke asked panicked.

"I there's something wrong with the engines." Lala said.

The pink haired girl ran off towards the engine room with the robot in tow.

Naruto started when the flashing red lights kicked in. He looked around in panic not knowing what that meant. He ran out headed for the bridge and approached just as the door opened and Lala ran out. Naruto tried to stop but the smooth metal floors made that impossible. Time seemed to move in slow motion as Naruto crashed into Lala and the two tumbled along the ground. When the two were done the young girl was sitting up confused but otherwise fine. Naruto on the other hand was lying on the ground facing the ceiling with his head currently buried under Lala.

"Mff faf!" Naruto shout was muffled. "I caff breaff!"

Lala bolted up and Naruto gasped for air.

"Oxygen! *Huff* Yay!" He cheered. "I'll never take you for granted again!"

As he stood up brushing himself off. "What's going on?"

"Something is wrong with the engine." Lala answered.

"That's bad right?" Naruto asked.

"It has the power source for everything on the ship." Peke explained.

"That's bad." Naruto said. "So where is it?"

"We're heading there now." Peke explained Lala was already running ahead.

Naruto bolted after her not knowing if there was anything he could do, but not willing to just sit in a corner and hope. He ran along behind her until she ran into what was easily the largest room he had seen on the ship. There were several control panels on various parts of the wall and taking up most of the room was a large metal block covered in pipes, cables, and hoses that he felt was safe to say was the engine.

The other thing he noticed was that the room was hot. He started sweating within seconds of entering the place and the air was wavy and hard to breath. Lala was running to a panel though at this point the core problem was obvious. Even Naruto could guess that if a room was clearly meant for people to enter then it probably shouldn't be hot enough to cook the occupants alive.

He just ran to the gigantic mass of steel and looked the whole thing over. He looked over the machine and began just looking for anything that didn't look quite right. Lala just went to the panel closest to the door and began scanning the engine to see what the problem was. Naruto wiped the sweat from his head and looked for anything that was obviously broken.

"Found it!" Lala exclaimed triumphantly.

She ran up to the engine and Naruto moved to where she was. A piece of debris was blocking off the coolant pump. The pump itself made up of four smaller pumps; smaller being relative each one was as tall as Lala, to direct to different parts of the engine quicker.

"It wasn't there before." Lala thought. "Take off must have dislodged it."

She reached out to grab the loose chunk of metal blocking the closest part of the pump. She pulled her hands back instantly afterwards.

"Ah hot!" She exclaimed.

Naruto thrust his hands down and grabbed the same piece of debris and almost did the same. Steam actually rose off his hands but he gritted his teeth and kept a hold. He pulled as hard as he could and the piece of metal came out and cut itself free of his hands and flying across the room. Without a pause Naruto reached out and grabbed the next block and grabbed ahold of what was blocking this one as the pump behind him started up. A loud hiss filled the room as his hands were scalded by the hot metal. He didn't slow down and pulled with everything he had yanking a piece of trapped sheet metal loose and threw it to the ground.

The Princess and robot were left stunned while he walked over to the next piece chunk of broken machinery and grabbed the hot metal with his bare hands pulling it out and tossing it aside. The last pump was the easiest as Naruto was able to just kick that one away with his foot. He fell back onto the ground from the force of his kick both hands hitting the ground. He pulled them back up instantly and flinched.

The lights and alarms stopped a few seconds later and the trio relaxed a bit. Lala stood and before Naruto could touch the ground lifted him up. She waved him along and they walked out the door. She didn't say anything at first seemingly distracted by yet more words Naruto couldn't read.

"Got it." She said. "Medical bays this way."

Naruto didn't get to say anything before she grabbed his arm and started pulling him along.

"Wait why are we going there?" Naruto asked.

"To find something for your hands." Lala answered.

"Well ask a stupid question." Naruto thought deadpan. He asked. "Shouldn't you be checking on the ship first?"

"If there's another problem the alarm will tell us." Lala said. "Now let's get a bandage for those hands."

Naruto was going to argue that he could find the place on his but that one was cut short by the fact that he couldn't read anything on the ship. So he let Lala pull him along giving him time to wonder some things. Had he really met an alien or was this just an insane dream caused by the head injury. If it was real did he have a way to get back home? Lastly why the hell was he acting so reluctant to simply let this girl take care of his hands?

Lala found the door and found the door wouldn't open. She gave the door a flat stare and pounded on it twice. It didn't react at all and she glared at it. Naruto stood watching confused as Lala raised a hand and pounded harder. She pulled a hand back again and slammed hard on the door leaving a dent. Naruto stared dumbfounded as Lala swung a second time and knocked the door in further. A third blow and Lala sent the door flying across the room.

"Wait what? How? Is that even possible?" Naruto thought staring in confusion and awe.

Lala simply grabbed Naruto's arm and pulled him into the room and stuck him on one of the bed. Naruto just sat staring at the girl and quietly wondering what was up with him.

"I must have been hit harder than I thought." He thought watching as Lala went through the drawers.

She ran out of drawers and tried a few cupboards on the wall before finally finding a set of bandages on a top shelf. After having Peke float up and grab the bandages she couldn't reach herself she pulled some random bottle off a lower shelf and headed back to where Naruto was sitting.

"Okay now show me your hands." Lala said cheerfully.

Naruto didn't argue this time. Not with the heavy steel door sitting in the back of the room reminding him what she could do. He held out his palms which were covered in second degree burns. It was around this moment that he learned Lala knew next to nothing about first aid. She tried putting the stuff in the bottle on which turned out to be rubbing alcohol. Naruto figured it was probably because she knew that stuff was used to sterilize spots but not much else. He gritted his teeth and did his best to hide the burst of pain under a grin. It was still infinitely less painful than what gave him the burns in the first place.

Peke actually stopped her before the next step. "Lala sama perhaps we should see if there is any medicine for burns and I believe there is supposed to be a layer of gauze between the bandages and the actual burns."

"Oh really?" Lala asked genuinely confused.

Without another word she bounced off to find both of those things.

"Oh thank god!" Naruto thought in relief.

"Got it." Lala chirped happily.

Naruto fought down the urge wince as Lala walked back to him with a set of gauze and a bottle of burn ointment. This time he relaxed slightly as she started rubbing his hands. Naruto stared at the girl rubbing his hands and relaxed a little as the pain faded.

"Are you okay?" Lala asked looking up.

Naruto started and asked. "Um yeah why?"

"Your face is all red." Lala said.

"Uh yeah that's nothing." Naruto said. "What the hell is wrong with me today?"

Lala blinked and nodded. "Okay well I'm going to check on where we're going."

"Right I think I'll… just lay here and heal I guess." Naruto said laying back.

"Alright I'll be back later." Lala said walking out to the bridge.

Naruto stared at the ceiling. It took exactly four seconds before he was bored out of his skull.

"Alright what should I do?" Naruto wondered to himself. "Well I guess I could try to work on the bunshin no jutsu."

He held up his hands up and looked at them.

"Right." Naruto thought annoyed. "Shit."

He let out a low growl before just shutting his eyes and just falling asleep.

A younger Naruto sat at the bar of a ramen shop next to an old guy with tanned skin in a white robe. A girl with a teenage girl with brown hair handed Naruto a bowl of ramen. The old man smiled down at him as he excitedly started scarfing down the soup.

"How do you like your ramen Naruto?" The old man asked.

"It's awesome old man!" Naruto shouted in excitement.

The old man chuckled at the over excited youngster. Naruto just ordered another bowl when another was just placed in front of him. Then as he picked up the bowl and was about to dig in the bowl started to grow.

"Wait what's going on?" He asked.

When no one answered he looked around and suddenly the ramen shop was gone and he was in large white void with nothing but him and the ever growing bowl. The next thing he knew he was being crushed under the weight of his soup. He struggled underneath grabbing onto the mysterious void. The whole thing was soft and caused his hands pain for some reason. Then noodles suddenly flooded over the bowl covering his face. He opened his mouth to shout and the noodles flooded in blocking his esophagus.

"This is it choked to death by a giant bowl of ramen." Naruto thought. "I always knew it would end this way."

Naruto shot up in the bed coughing out a bunch of hair. He looked around taking deep breaths and suddenly an arm grabbed him by the neck and pulled him back down. He felt a head on his chest and looked down. Lala had apparently crept into the bed with him while he was asleep.

"Why is she?" He wondered.

"Papa." She mumbled. "I'll put the ships back together."

"What is she talking about?" Naruto thought. "I guess she's dreaming about home or something. That's she's already been out away from home before we even met hasn't she?"

She smiled as she pulled in closer.

"Man is she cute. Where did that come from?" Naruto thought. "Anyway what should I do? I'll need to get home right."

Lala mumbled again. "Nana Momo don't fight."

"Is she talking about her family?" He wondered. Remembering how there was probably no one really waiting at home for him. Maybe the old man was worried but that was it. "Well I suppose we could get her home first."


	3. Hope you have your Space AAA card

"Captain's log. Start date. Thursday. We've been adrift for a week, I think hard to tell with out a sun rise or set. My hands finally healed from burnt off flesh to just a bit red and chaffed. I have been working on learning the first move from the Scroll. Not enough room to train though may have to save it for when we land." Naruto sat saying alone in a dark room.

The door shot open. "Naruto san stop talking to yourself and come to the bridge where getting near a planet."

Naruto glared at the floating robot's back as it floated away. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and walked through the metallic halls of the ship onto the bridge. The first thing he noticed when walking in was the middle monitor that seemed between bursts of static revealed a large round object mostly green with large patches of grey and red.

"So that's the place were landing?" Naruto asked. "Does anyone actually live there?"

"Yep all the auto pilot locations are parts of the empire." Lala said. "We should be able to get the ship fixed when we land there."

Naruto walked over and sat at one of the chairs. Peke had told him earlier that whenever they entered the atmosphere that he would need to be strapped into a seat since the ship wasn't in top condition. He reached for the sides and pulled two buckles out and pressed the two together with a whir and a clicked the two pieces of the harness connected. The others were ready to go with in seconds and faster than Naruto would have thought possible the shudder of the ship hitting the atmosphere. Naruto had hold back the urge to throw up as the ship shook only few feet either way but shook so rapidly that he seemed to be seeing seven or eight copies of the bridge layered over each other at different heights.

The ship rumbled on for several minutes before the shuddering started to calm down. As the ride smoothed out the ship released the harnesses hold them in place. Once the fact that the ship stopped completely Lala stood up and walked over to the communication officer's station. She punched in a code at one of the stations. She watched one of the monitors for a few seconds before smiling.

"I take it you found someone who can help?" Naruto asked.

"Yep we're getting brought to a space port." Lala said.

"So we can finally get this tub patched up." Naruto said happily. "I won't have to sleep in the infirmary anymore."

Lala nodded cheerfully. Naruto literally jumped for joy, smacked his head on the ceiling and fell back to the ground. Lala giggled at him for a second before lifting him off the ground. Naruto just clutched the top of his head he hadn't gotten another concussion.

"So what do we do till then?" Naruto asked.

"Um twenty questions?" Lala asked.

Naruto's eyebrow twitched they had been playing this game all week. It wasn't like they had a choice though it was pretty much the only thing to do on the ship. Considering that they weren't exactly from the same planet neither of them had gotten a single one right either. Peke strangely enough though had a perfect win streak .First thing he was doing on landing was finding some way to get a deck of cards and some god damn board game.

"Oh for the love of my various gods isn't there anything else to do." He grumbled under his breath.

Lala looked up in thought for a second before remembering another game she'd heard from a servant once.

"How about truth or dare?" Lala asked.

"Well it's something different." Naruto said. "How do you play?"

"Well we take turns asking "Truth or dare" and if you say dare you have to do something the other person tells you and if you say truth you have to answer a question truthfully." Lala explained.

"Okay then truth or dare?" Naruto asked.

An hour later a metallic ship resembling a metallic chicken egg if it had been stretched out length wise and had a large rocket engine strapped to the back arrive. A magnetic headed chain launched out and attached itself to the hull of the Devilukean cruiser that was floating motionlessly above a large green sea. Onboard the ship Naruto was a complete wreck lying on his back breathing heavily. He had picked dare every single time and Lala was surprisingly sadistic in her choices. The worst one in his book was by far the dress. The most annoying part though was by far the fact that she did the whole thing with childish glee and the kind of innocent expression that reminded him of a three year old that didn't know what they were doing. Lala simply sat with a smile waiting for her turn to answer.

"Oh god." Naruto thought between breathes. "Never again."

As the two rested the door to the bridged opened and they looked to the left. The one standing in it was a bipedal creature roughly seven feet tall with a bright red exoskeleton and large glittering green compound eyes with a clacking four part mouth and wearing nothing but a cap. If not for the fact that it looked like a giant bug Naruto would have been disturbed by this fact. Thanks to the fact that it was Naruto was instead incredibly happy to see the humanoid bug before Lala could get the chance to torment him more.

"Hey the. What's it called? Tow guy is here." Naruto said hoping to get Lala to focus in something else.

"Ahhh." Lala said disappointed.

The bug in question just stared at the two kids on the bridged before saying in a hiss like voice with a clicking noise to it. "Where could I find the pilot of this vessel?"

Lala raised her hand.

He stared in disbelief before figuring the real one must have been humoring her. "Where's the captain then?"

Lala pointed to the Peke. The robot simply raised a single hand in a casual wave.

"This thing is the captain?" The bug person asked.

"Well sort of the closest we thing we have." Lala admitted.

"So when do we get to this port?" Naruto asked. "I really can't wait to eat something besides rations."

He looked down at the blond. "Your joking there's got to be some adult on this tub."

"No we kind of took by accident." Lala admitted. "Both times."

The man stared dumbfounded at the two kids and stared in disbelief.

"Well I'm." He paused to think of exactly what he had to say. "You'll have to sit in quarantine for a while."

"What's a quarantine?" Naruto asked.

"It means we have to wait to make sure we don't have any diseases that could hurt the population." Peke explained. "It probably won't take more than a day."

"Oh man another day just sitting in a room with nothing to do." Naruto whined.

"I'm sure we can request something." Peke answered.

"Fine." Naruto begrudgingly agreed.

"Right well I think I'll go let them know where coming." The bug person said walking back away. "This is just too weird."

Elsewhere in a large office room in sat another red bug man, this one's shell a dark shade, at a desk flipping through paper work when a buzz went off. He pressed a button on the corner of his desk.

"Yes?" He asked.

"Sir that Devilukean vessel had none other than the princess on it." A hissing voice answered over a speaker.

"Are you sure?" He asked.

"A pink haired, Devilukean, girl in her early teens with access to a military vessel I don't know who else it could be." The voice on the other end said.

"Well then." The bug man as the desk said. "Bring her straight to me. Now if you'll excuse me I have to call my son."

"Excellent." He said with a low hiss.

At the port the princess and blond were sitting in a small room Lala rubbing her arm from where a blood sample had been taken. Naruto hadn't really paid much attention as the pain had vanished almost instantaneously for him. He simply sat staring at what he had heard while they were getting the samples taken.

"What the hell did she mean she's never heard of ramen?" He thought. "What kind of hellish place is this?!"

A large red bug man walked through the door followed closely by a smaller bright red one only about Naruto's height. Behind both of them was another slightly larger than the dark red one who was dark green. As they had learned after arriving the color was how to tell the males and females apart.

"Ah Princess Lala allow me to introduce myself." The man said with light bow. "I am Lord Soala the head of this country."

"Hello." Lala said cheerfully.

"And this is my son." He said clearing out of the way and waving to the shortest of the three. "Konja."

"A please to make your acquaintance." Konja said.

"Hi nice to meet you." Lala replied.

"Well I have checked on the results and you're clean to leave." Soala said. "I have come to give you the offer to stay at the governor's mansion while your ship is repaired."

"Ah really thank you." She cheered. "Naruto, Peke come on."

Naruto stood up.

"Um Lady Lala who is this?" Asked the Soala.

"Peke is my invention." Lala answered.

"No I meant the other one?" He asked.

"Oh that's Naruto." She said. "He's a human who was one my ship when it took off."

"Well I'm afraid he can't stay at the mansion." Soala said. "Crap they didn't mention there was another boy this could interfere with my plan."

"Why not?" Lala asked with a confused stare.

"Err security reasons." Soala replied. "I have to make sure nothing gets in my boy's way."

"Okay then." Lala said.

Soala nodded happily.

Lala grabbed Naruto's hand and tugged his arm. "Come on Naruto maybe they'll let us sleep on the ship."

"What?" Soala asked surprise clear in his voice.

Naruto stared dumbfounded as Lala simply pulled him along with almost no effort.

"Crap Soala think how do I? No choice!" The Lord thought. "I supposed we could make an exception."

"Huh?" Lala asked.

"Well better to have an unknown than leave King Gid's precious eldest daughter unprotected." Soala lied through his mandibles. "He'll have to have a full time guard to make sure you don't cause any problems."

Naruto just shrugged. "Whatever."

"Meanwhile Lady Lala why don't you have my son show you around." Soala said. He then leaned down close and quietly clacked something to Konja.

Naruto looked suspiciously at the duo. He and Peke shared a look alerting the other that they were both suspicious of what the red guy was planning. The trio was led to a transport a collection of metallic cars with each with rectangular metal legs resembling a large centipede.

"What's up with the weird cart?" Naruto asked.

"Our planet's surface is mostly water. These ships are designed to be able to easily switch from land based locomotion to paddling through the algae rich seas." The bug woman answered.

"Oh. Neat." Naruto said.

They all the machine with a glass dome closing over the people seated inside and with a shudder the mechanical beast lumbered off towards their destination. The machine traveled surprisingly smooth across the ground as it rhythmically stamped along. The Lord and his son sat making clicking noises at each other with the secretary Naruto and Peke guessed occasionally interrupted. Lala meanwhile had her face pressed against the dome of the entrance looking out over the city.

The buildings were mostly dome like structures never going more than what looked to be seven or eight floors high. The place was rather unusual in the coloration compared to most either of them had seen, with bright blues being the primary color of most. The citizens went everywhere naked except headgear that seemed to be used to mark workers.

This lasted until they got the edge of the city which abruptly cut off into a large mess of green. At first Naruto thought it was a grass land of some kind until the front of their transport descended into it a shifted to paddling through. Naruto joined Lala in staring out the windows in awe at the small sea as the machine paddled unhindered through the soupy waters. For a brief moment Naruto could have sworn he saw something snaking through the water but brushed it aside.

Peke meanwhile focused heavily on the clacking though did its best job to make absolute certain to store all the conversation it could. The ship would have a working translator once repairs on the bridge were finished.

"Hopefully that won't be too late." The costume bot thought.

It had found the sudden change of heart there host had about letting Naruto stay after Lala almost didn't highly suspicious. Also the fact that they were going out of there way hold their conversation in a language none of the others would likely have spoken. Admittedly it could have been innocent but better safe than sorry considering who she was with.

Naruto didn't exactly trust the guy either but had far less he could do about it. There wasn't really any way to tell Lala about it since he'd have no way of getting any privacy but he was defiantly going to keep an eye on her whenever he could help it.

"Ah at last we've arrived." Soala said standing up and spreading his arms.

The three off-worlders turned to the front to see the Lord's "mansion". A better description would have been castle. The whole thing had a surrounding wall blocking off the view of the main court yard but the towers told them that the place was no simple big house. The snipers at the top of the towers also gave hints as to what lay within. A large metal shield similar to the one where the windows on the ship used to be raised up and the metallic centipede thing crawled in out of the water. Several soldiers saluted as they entered and the Lord waved them on. As their ride pulled up near a large main door it slowed to a stop.

Lord Soala stepped out with a bow said. "Lady Lala allow me to formally welcome you to the Lord's mansion. If there is anything you need all you need do is ask."

Omake theater.

The ship slowly descended towards the surface of a large planet. The ground made of a strange purple rock. The landing was serviceable but imperfect. Lala, Naruto, and Peke all walked out of the ship to find a single native waiting to greet them. A green, scaled, humanoid being with a fish like face.

"There's one." Peke said.

"I'm tellin' you we don't need directions." Naruto complained.

"Be quiet." Peke told him. "Hello sir could you?"

"I CAN SEE THE FUTURE!" He shouted in a high pitched voice.

"That's nice but I." Peke said.

"GIANT MONKEYS ARE GOING TO DESTROY MY PEOPLE!" He shouted. "IN THE FUTURE!"

"Okaaay." Naruto said. "This was a bad idea."

"THE BLOND BOY IS GOING TO HAVE MORE GIRLS THAN HE CAN COUNT ON HIS FINGERS FALL IN LOVE WITHH HIM BUT WON'T REALIZE IT TILL THEY ALL COME OUT AND SAY IT!" He shouted. "IN THE FUTURE!"

"All right back on the ship let's go back to the planet with the green slug people." Naruto said pushing them back onto the ship. "Maybe they'll be more help."


	4. Breakfast at Soala's

Naruto grumbled as he walked through the halls towards what would be his room. He was flanked on either side by an eight foot tall bug man and he had been separated from Lala. He wasn't entirely sure Peke could do anything if they got into trouble and as far as he could tell Lala hadn't even noticed that the Lord at least was acting incredibly suspicious.

"This is where you will be spending your stay." One of the guards said opening the door to a bare bones room with nothing but a bunk hanging from the wall and a small door to the side.

"So do you guys tell me where I can't go in the mansion or?" Naruto asked.

"Anywhere." The guard said. "You'll be spending your stay in this room."

"You know you could try being subtle." Naruto pointed out.

"Or we could shoot you in the head for being a threat to the lord at the slightest hint of provocation." His "escort" replied.

Naruto had no idea what that meant but assumed it involved him injured or dead. He hadn't skipped or slept through every class and he knew what a threat sounded like.

"Well can I at least get something to eat?" He asked doing his best to act bullied into obedience.

"Meals will be brought at standard times if you have a problem otherwise deal with it." The guard said pushing the small blond into his room. "Bathrooms that door over there and there aren't any windows so don't think about escaping."

The door slammed leaving Naruto alone in the room to plot to his daring escape. "Okay there clearly not planning on letting me leave any time soon, and they probably aren't planning on letting me talk to Lala so why am I still alive."

Lala meanwhile was being lead through a different set of corridors by the young Konja.

"Why does Naruto have to sleep on the other side of the mansion?" Lala asked as she followed a short ways behind the bug boy.

"Security reasons." He explained vaguely. "We can't have a peasant sleeping in close proximity to the princess. He might get in the way if you need protected."

Lala gave him a small glare after he said that. "Don't talk bad about Naruto."

"What?" Konja asked. "I didn't say anything bad about him."

"You called him a peasant." Lala said.

"That's what he is. Or is he of noble blood?" Konja asked had tilted.

Lala tried to remember what she could but it was kind of pointless Naruto had always quickly changed the subject whenever his family was brought up.

"Well whatever just don't call him that." Lala said.

"Very well." Konja said. "So she's offended. I have to be more careful."

"Good." Lala said smiling again.

"Well this is your room." Konja said. "If you'd like me to show you anywhere please simply ask and I shall."

"Okay." Lala answered him cheerfully looking over her temporary accommodations. It was fully furnished with a large comfortable looking bed, a chair, small sofa, curtained window and an intercom looking thing probably intended to call for servants.

She sighed and walked over to the bed planning to take a nap after the long trip. Peke floated down into the chair and started thinking things over. It couldn't tell Lala its suspicions just yet since the girl might just accuse their host on the spot and without proof that could cause a diplomatic incident. It would have to find evidence of wrong doing first so that any fallout would be on their host's side. Well that would have to wait it was night fall at the moment and Peke need to recharge.

The second day on the planet their ship had brought them to and Naruto didn't like it one bit the stupid sheet of metal with a pad they called a bed was nearly impossible to sleep on. He was hungry, groggy, and to top it off had found the camera watching him so he couldn't find an easy escape without putting himself in danger. A hollow banging rang through his room.

"Here's yer breakfast, meat." Said a raspy voice as the door was pulled open.

A green bug walked through with a tray with a bowl and spoon on it. The bug woman set the bowl down and walked away. The door shut and Naruto walked over to find a bowl of green slime laid out as his meal.

"I hate this planet." Naruto said in exasperation. His stomach growled and with a sigh he dug into his cold slime. One bite in and his eyes widened in horror. "I actually wish I had a ration right now."

Lala during this moment was being escorted to a finely decorated dining room with a large table laid out at each spot was a large bowl and a plate of odd looking fruits.

"Ah lady Lala so good of you to join us." Konja greeted her upon arrival.

He quickly stood up and pulled a chair out for her.

She smiled at him and sat down before looking around the table confused.

"Where's Naruto?" Lala asked.

Soala answered quickly. "He took breakfast in his room."

"Why?" Lala asked. As far as she remembered Naruto actually liked eating with other people.

"He said something about it being too early." Soala lied through his mandibles.

Lala pouted and started on the fruit.

"Excellent everything is going according to plan." The Lord thought.

"Why is she so concerned for this Naruto?" Konja thought. "Father said he'd be well taken care of does she not believe him?"

Meanwhile back in his cell Naruto was sitting in the cell he had been dumped in with a still mostly full bowl in front of him. The guard walked in followed by another green shelled servant.

"Come on." The guard told him. "His lordship insisted that we take you on a "hunting trip"."

Naruto stood up and followed his stomach letting out a growl as he followed.

"He didn't eat it. Oh well weakness from hunger should work." The guard said.

Naruto stood and followed as the guard lead him for the main exit while the servant took his tray back to the kitchen.

Elsewhere in the castle Peke was floating near the ceilings to stay out of guard view. The tiny robot had used its ability to change shape and color to match the patterns above it and hoped that would be enough. It drifted quietly looking for the office of the lord who ran the place. It approached an intersection that was surprisingly heavily guarded figuring obviously there was something important this way.

A single guard looked up in Peke's direction and the bot froze in place. The guard continued to stare at the spot for several seconds before turning back to the halls mumbling to himself. "Been on this shift to long, I'm seen things."

Peke slowly started creeping along the roof again slowly as possible to avoid attracting attention. It checked to make sure the coast was clear and slid down. The door had a guard posted on either side. Peke would not be deterred and began thinking of a distraction when a glimpse of orange and yellow caught its attention. Just outside the window Naruto was being loaded into one of the large centipede cars and escorted off the premise.

"Well that's not good." Peke thought. A second later it realized the windows could be a good back up way in and floated around and just hoped Naruto could take care of himself since there wasn't really anything it could do.

Back with Naruto he sat in the transport surrounded by four large goons with long metal tubes with handles all looking at him. He didn't like the looks of how things were going at the moment and watched as they approached what looked to be a large forest island where all the foliage looked to be red but otherwise wasn't that off from the forests of his home. They pulled up to the shore and one of the thugs through him out.

"So what happens now?" Naruto asked to buy time.

"Now you have a tragically fatal hunting accident." The guard said.

"Wait can you at least tell me what's going on before I die?" Naruto asked panicked.

"No." The bug man said punctuated by the sound of a suppressed rifle.

Back in the offices of the lord Peke looked through the filling cabinet trying to figure out what was going on. It flipped through the folders rapidly as possible looking inside quickly hoping for anything useful tossing aside folders as it finished them. Until it came across the first useful bit of info a simple purchase report.

"Neigsant that's the suggestion enhancing drug they use for interrogations but what are these other two?" Peke wondered.

Lala was seated just having finished her breakfast and making small talk the way she was taught. As she mentioned wanting to see one of the centipede cars again something started to kick in. Her vision blurred a bit while to those watching from outside her eyes became glassy and half lidded.

The lord laced his fingers. "Just as plan."

Soala's thought was interrupted by the kitchen door being kicked in. A kitchen knife flew in and landed in the middle of the table as an orange blur crashed down immediately after. Naruto grabbed Lala by the hand and pulled the confused princess up.

"Lala were getting out of here." He said.

"Guards!" Soala shouted. "How is he alive I had him ordered executed not twenty minutes ago!?"

Naruto pulled Lala into a bridal carry and jumped out the window glass scattering everywhere as he went. Naruto brought his hands together best he could most fingers curled back except the pointer and middle finger on each hand which he held in a cross shape.

"Tajuu Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" He shouted and with a series of loud pops a large cloud of smoke blocked everyone's line of sight. Those closest could just faintly here several voices ringing out the word. "Henge."

As the smoke cleared dozens of pairs of Naruto and Lala hit the ground and scattered in every direction. One of the pairs noticed a small white hand waving out a window and the Naruto stuck a hand out pulling Peke who was carrying a single sheet of paper. The various clones took advantage of the confusion and kicked off walls, crawled over anything they could, or even just tried running up them.

As they started leaping through air some of the various guards started coming back to their senses and opening fire.

"Don't you idiot's you might hit the princess!" Soala shouted out the windows.

The real Naruto and Lala made it over the wall and plunged head first into the sea. They had to dive tens of feet to escape the algae blocking the surface and water was pitch black beneath with Naruto swimming along as fast as he could in a direction his gut said would work. Naruto was left had to struggle to hold his breath as he swam. He felt something brush against his leg and in a moment of panic tried to swim faster.

A long slimy tentacle wrapped around his ankle and he released Lala as he struggled with the long arm. Another wrapped around his other leg. Then a third his waist and is started to pull him lower and lower into the water. He tried to drag them off and another wrapped itself around his torso and arm holding it to his body while the next one grabbed his wrist and coiled around his arm. As he felt another tentacle wrap around his neck and reach for his mouth he did the only thing left he could. He opened wide and as soon as he felt it enter bit down as hard as he could. He tasted blood and felt the tentacles struggled and chewed in to the appendage fighting with everything he had. Whatever was at the end released the rest of his body to go for some reason as Naruto's teeth cut through the tentacle causing it to retract in pain.

He swam for the surface to get air chewing up and eating the tentacle on the way. He surface and found Lala just sitting immobile at the top of the water. He grabbed Lala and tugged her along the water towards the island his clone had been executed on.

With the group that had Peke arrived back on the ground the city was on.

"How did you escape?" Peke asked. "I saw them taking you away."

"I never left." Answered breathing heavily. "This technique that lets me make copies of myself and the one that let me copy Lala was a transformation technique."

Peke just stared at him dumbfounded. "I didn't know humans could do that."

"How?" Peke asked.

"Well that gruel they gave me tasted nasty so I ran into the bathroom gagging and found that they apparently didn't have a camera in there." Naruto explained with a grin. "So I made a clone and disguised myself as my spoon and flushed the real one down the toilet."

"You disguised yourself as a spoon?" Peke asked. "How is that even physically possible?!"

"Dunno." Naruto answered with a shrug.

Peke looked at him with what was the closest thing to a dumbfounded stare a pair of spirals and no other facial features could resemble.

Back inside the castle the lord sat at his desk across from the variously sized subordinates who stood trembling as their boss watched them fingers laced.

"So would any of you care to explain why the little "human" is still alive?" He asked them in a low hiss.

"Well we took him to get rid of him like you said boss." One of them said.

The Lord's attention focused on him for a moment.

"Ah s-sorry your Lordship." The man answered. "We took the boy and Zonga shot him right in the head."

"And he's still running around?" Soala demanded angrily.

"That's the thing he just popped into a puff of smoke and vanished on the wind." The lackey replied.

Konja just stood at the back of the room and clicked once in annoyance.

"I have to admit this wasn't quite how I expected the plan to fail." He thought.

Konja and his father were having a discussion in the transport on their way to the mansion with the princess, robot, and new boy.

"Okay here's the plan when we get when we have breakfast in the morning I'll spike the girl's with some Neigsant and a powerful aphrodisiac." Soala said.

"Why do you just have a powerful aphrodisiac?" Konja asked.

"For the maids it's not important anyway you will use her new suggestible state of mind and heightened sex drive to train her to be your." Soala said.

"Why don't I just try to charm her the old fashioned way?" Konja asked.

"Because if that ship has a homing beacon we only have one or two weeks." Soala answer. "Now stop interrupting me."

"But if they arrive before she's been reduced to an obedient sex slave won't we be brutally executed as an example?" Konja asked.

"Look I'll spike her food, you condition her to do whatever you say with sex as a reward, you marry her, we get positions of incredible unfathomable importance and power. That's the plan got it." Soala said irritated.

"This seems like a plan that could very easily back fire and get us both killed." Konja said.

"Thats. The. Plan." Soala said. " ."

"Yes father." Konja finally said in a resigned tone. "We're going to die."


	5. Attack it's weak point!

Naruto pulled Lala into the woods breathing heavily and looking over his shoulder. He sighed lightly as he pulled the pink haired princess onto his back and hopped through the forest as fast as he could. He reached moved as fast as he could through the forest ignoring the sloshing sound behind him as he tried to escape.

"Okay Lala's a vegetable, I don't know what happened to Peke, and if this guy has half a brain he's guarding the ship." Naruto thought as he bounced through the forest. "Well it could be worse the planet could be about to blow up."

In a large castle walking through the halls was a child looking man with spiky black hair and pointy teeth with a long tail similar to Lala's except longer compared to his body and ending in a wicked looking trident.

"Zastin get a ship ready I've just been told that they found the distress beacon from the ship Lala left on." He said.

Naruto just kept hoping through the forest trying to ignore the shudder that went through his entire body the second he thought that. A loud tink sound alerted him to something behind him. He stopped and turned back to find a lone brick lying in the middle of the woods.

"Huh always thought that was just an expression." He said.

He shook his head rapidly back and forth to regain his focus and started moving again he needed a hiding place before they came looking for them. He bound through the woods his mind focused, for once. Ironically this distracted him from the light moaning coming from his back. He charged forward barely noticing when Lala started shifting around in rhythm his jumps.

Meanwhile in the city heading in the direction of the space port were a Naruto clone disguised as one of the locals and Peke disguised as a hat they had seen one of the workers there wearing. The clone moved slowly through the crowd doing its best not to draw attention. They approached the building and noticed right away that there was a pair of armed guards between them and the entrance. Naruto did the best approximation of gritting his teeth he could. They could try to scout the place and see if there was another entrance but that would probably look suspicious and draw unnecessary attention. After all if he worked there why not take the front door.

He approached the door slowly hoping the guards wouldn't suspect anything. He approached the door one of the guards giving him light nod as he passed. He stepped through door and started heading for where his and Lala's ship had been. Naruto moved through the halls of the building tilting his head every now and again as he passed any of the bug people. He slowly worked his way through the place until eventually he found their ship crawling with armed guards.

"Ah fu."

The original Naruto was standing just outside of a gap in a rock wall. Well a few dozen feet below a hole in a rock wall but nothing he couldn't jump easily but he wasn't sure about the risk. There was no way to tell if the thing was large enough to hide in or if it just dropped off just inside. He looked at the forest and debated looking for a new hiding place.

Lala moaned on his back and he shook his head. With a quick jump he was standing at the edge of the cave entrance relying on the little distance in sunlight went. It looked safe enough no sudden drops or giant monsters in sight. He walked into the point the light started to dim and set the girl down. He sat next to her and did his best to ignore his empty belly.

"Ugh maybe it would have been better if there had been a monster in here." Naruto whined in mind. "Then at least I might be able to kill it for food."

He looked over at Lala and saw the pink haired girl stirring a bit but couldn't tell exactly what she was doing in the low light. He looked out and the cave entrance and started to think over the situation. He needed to find Peke and the ship, get off this rock, and he added after a growl of his stomach had to find something to eat.

"Maybe I could hunt something." He thought. "I wonder if there's anything in that forest I could kill bare handed."

Naruto went to stand up when a hand reached up and grabbed his arm.

"Lala? What do you need?" He asked the princess and after a pause added. "And why is your hand wet?"

Lala didn't answer she just pulled him to the ground.

Back at the ship.

"ck me!" The clone thought. "Of course the ship is the most heavily guarded place on this damn rock! Why wouldn't it be?"

He shuffled off out of sight and found a janitorial closet and sat down. "All right Peke now what?"

"I'm not sure myself." Peke said. "Perhaps there main office will have something useful."

Naruto nodded and walked out heading around the building. He didn't remember until he got out that he couldn't read the signs and was stuck walking around. He moved at a snail's pace checking one by one to find what looked to be an administrative room. The first one he checked had been a failure.

"Eeeeekkk Pervert!" shouted a woman he probably would have thought was human if not for the purple hair and all black eyes standing half naked in what looked to be a changing room.

A colossal failure that had set him back half an hour of running around to lose his attacker.

The second attempt ended with him walking into a janitor's closet that was "occupied" by a male and female of the bug people.

"And now I'm scarred for life." Naruto thought shutting the door behind him.

The third attempt taught him a lesson on which symbol marked the men's restroom and which the women's.

"You again!" Shouted the purple haired woman.

After dodging a paper towel dispenser, some other dispenser he didn't recognize, and a sink that had been in a counter built into a wall he managed to escape around a corner and duck into a hanger. He listened at the door and when he heard someone run by and turned back to what was inside. He looked up to find a yellow, oval shaped ship with four raised ridges, two on top two on bottom, that had thrusters sticking out of the back.

"Peke I think I have a plan." Naruto said.

"Found you!" Came a shout form the door.

"Damn it." Naruto deadpanned.

Back in the cave Naruto was laying on the ground with Lala seated on his stomach. He looked up the girl that had him pinned. She was breathing heavily and her face was red, she was sweating and sliding her waste back and forth.

"Are you okay?" He asked nervously. "What is that wet spot?"

"I feel hot." She said in between heavy breaths.

Naruto's eyes bulged as she grabbed the bottom of her dress and started pulling it up. Naruto panicked and grasped blindly with both hands one grabbed her wrist but the other missed and caught a hold of something else.

"Aaaahhh! My tail." Lala moaned as her arms were reduced to a pair of wet noodles.

Naruto stared at her reaction as he held her tail in one hand. Without really paying attention he twitched his fingers.

"Aaah more." Lala let out breathing heavily once more.

He moved his hand again sliding up to the spade at the end. Lala let out a long moan the whole time. He moved his thumb and pointer finger up and started playing with the end of it. Lala's response was heavy breath and several increasingly loud shouts.

"Yes!" Lala said as she started sliding rapidly against the boy beneath her.

"Did my pants just get tighter?" The blond thought.

"Yes! Yes! More!" Lala cried feeling something welling up deep inside her.

Naruto stopped cold as he caught a glimpse of something moving above him.

"No! Don't stop. More!" Lala complained.

Naruto sat straight up tackling Lala just in time to avoid being crushed to death by the pincer claw of some enormous shelled beast. Naruto grabbed Lala and fled from the cave to get away from the beast there, well whatever they had been doing, had attracted. As Naruto hit the ground he heard a loud furious hissing noise and turned back. The creature following them out was a rhinoceros sized beast that had a two sectioned body with a six long legs, two claw arms, and a gapping circular maw with a ring of teeth. Naruto tucked Lala under an arm and carried her as he hopped through the woods away from the beast tailing them.

"What is that some kind of spider, crab thing." Naruto thought as he jumped from tree to tree hearing the beast behind them. "And why is it so fast."

Lala just glared back in direction of the spider crab.

Meanwhile patrolling the forests looking for the two were a pair of bug men.

"I'm telling you we'll be fine it's just a couple of kids." One said.

"But one of them is Devilukian those people are insanely powerful." Said the other. "I mean seriously do you know what they can?"

"Just shut up and search already. Nothing bad is going to happen" The other replied as the earth started shaking and a loud clinking noise went off. "What the?"

An orange blur shot by him a split second before a pincer launched forward and severed his head in the blink of an eye.

"I told you so." Was all the other got to say before his torso was grabbed and crushed into a mess of white goo.

Naruto looked back as the spider crab stopped chasing them and brought the headless body of one up to its mouth. He turned back and kept moving away just in case that didn't fill it up. He stopped at the edge of the forest and looked over the woods. He briefly considered turning back. Lala started nuzzling his cheek. Her legs clamped onto his and she started moving her hips rubbing them against his leg. Naruto turned over to look at her and wrapped her arms around his neck leaning in close. A few inches from his face she was interrupted again.

"You stop right there!" Someone shouted to him.

Naruto and Lala turned slowly to find a group of bug men with rifles trained on them. Naruto let go of Lala and put his hands up in the air. He didn't know why but the weapon intimidated him more than even the giant spider crab. Lala pouted angrily at the bug men as they started waving their weapons around. Her tail curved around her waist and the point aimed at the tip at the men.

"I said!" One of them began.

A flash of light came from the end of Lala's tail and shot across the distance and there was a loud boom. Naruto covered his eyes and shrank away from the explosion. He turned back to the spot the two men had been. They were lying twitching in the center of a large crater that had been where Lala had shot. Their rifles were bent and broken and several trees had splintered and collapsed near the edge bits of wood scattered everywhere.

"Okay from now on no matter what I do. I will never, ever, under pain of death, only other choice is to jumping into a boiling vat of acid, ever piss off Lala." Naruto thought terrified.

Lala walked over to the two twitching s bug people and kicked the one that interrupted. "Hmph."

Lala walked back over to Naruto arms crossed and pouting. Naruto stood unmoving for a few seconds before letting out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. He started thinking of what to do next when a sudden wave of memories that couldn't possibly have belonged to him hit him.

At the port the clone Naruto had made a second Kage Bunshin and the two approached the ship with empty boxes. They came up to a pair of guards at the entrance.

"Halt what are you doing." Asked one of the guards.

"We have orders to clear some off the wreckage parts out." The one of the clones replied. "We're supposed to make it look like we've been trying to fix up the ship so it doesn't look suspicious if the Devilukians get here."

The guard nodded. "Makes sense."

The other waved them through and they headed on to the ship. They marched along headed for the bridge hall. They split up in that hall thankful that apparently the guards hadn't posted anyone inside the ship. The clone with Peke functioning as his hat went into the bridge while the other clone snuck into the captain's quarters. On the bridge Peke dropped down and turned back into its basic form. The tiny robot disassembled the machine and the put a black box inside the metal container the clone carried. After the two clones collected what they had been sent for they started popping in and out of various rooms collecting the debris to hide the computer in one box and the forbidden scroll in the other.

The clones walked out of the ship the guards waving them along. They approached a hanger the clone had found earlier to contain a completely unoccupied ship. A large red ship with a long body and four connectors extending into a set of four thrusters with the nose aimed at the sky in an open roofed hanger. The duo approached an elevator that lifted them to the entrance high on the side and the clone with the scroll walked off to store it elsewhere. The main clone left Peke in the bridged to install the navigational computer while he hoped down to the ground from the door. He wanted to do one quick search of the place to see if he could scrounge some supplies.

As he walked out the door a voice shouted. "There you are!"

The clone turned just in time to get a face full of fist and vanished in a puff of smoke.

The real Naruto stood at shore grinning as he stared forward.

"Hey Lala if we got one of those things they use to get around could you drive it?" He asked.

"Maybe but I'd need a few minutes." Lala said.

"Well then I think I've found us a way out of here." Naruto said with a smile.


	6. Omake: The Importance of Knocking

Naruto sat alone in the front of the ship staring out the window. Lala and Peke had gone off to take do something the robot refused to elaborate on. So Naruto sat dealing with the one part of space travel fiction never prepares you for.

"I'm bored!" Naruto screamed at the void.

After a moment of space not answering Naruto wandered off to explore the ship. He strolled alone through the halls listening to the sound of his own foot steps. First he drifted into a supply closet. The cleaners where knocked everywhere and the fumes were visible. He slammed the door and left.

Opening the second door Naruto was immediately buried under a pile of electronics with only his head and hands sticking out.

"Ack my kidneys!" Naruto shouted and the heavy mass of computer parts.

Naruto tried to stand up and brush it off. He couldn't get up and sighed. He took a moment before looking down.

"Errgh." Naruto said before opening his mouth and bit on one of the parts picking it up with his mouth. "Oh god this tastes awful."

Half an hour later he finally crawled free. He got up kicked a busted monitor and hurt his foot. Naruto muttered silent curses as he moved down the hall. Most of the unexplored rooms left in the hall where pretty empty.

He eventually heard a sound as he turned a corner. He walked along the hall way and it slowly got clearer. It was someone talking. Naruto quickly slid up the hall with the sound getting louder as he approached a room. He couldn't read the sign but didn't care and just put his ear up the door.

Lala and Peke where having some unintelligible conversation but he could tell from the occasional laugh from Lala they were having fun.

"They left me to sit alone bored on the bridge well they go off and have fun themselves." Naruto thought annoyed.

He leaned in closer and the automated doors popped open. Naruto fell on his face. He looked up and saw Lala standing naked holding a shower head. Naruto's face turned bright red.

"Naruto did you want to take a shower too?" Lala asked with a wide smile.

Naruto in a panic tried to push himself up. Lala quickly ran over to help him up. Naruto kept his head pointed down and saw a quick flash of something pink between Lala's legs. Naruto's nose launched a stream of blood so powerful it rocketed him into the air. He smacked his head against the ceiling and got knocked right back to the ground.

"Ah! Naruto! Are you okay!?" Lala asked in a panic crouching down to lift Naruto's head.

Naruto tilted his head up and stared right up into her chest. A second spurt of blood launched him through the air and crashed right into the wall opposite the shower room. Lala ran over to check on him and found him out cold.

Peke just watched shaking its head. "I hope blood loss doesn't get him before we even get to the first planet."


End file.
